I'm fucking manic

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equinefeather:

today when I was riding my horse, I saw another horse in a nearby pasture and I’m like “oh my god!!! look!! it’s a horse!!!” 

I get excited about seeing horses

while on a horse

and that’s basically all you need to know about me

stand-up-comic-gifs:

Kumail Nanjiani

lanfleming:

So we had a project in astronomy to sell a constellation that had to include a rubric full of requirements. This is what my best friend submitted instead.. He got an A.

gaypee:

"i’m hungry"
"you just ate"
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stabdaddroog:

gimel-vav-chet-shin:

#Canadian winter

THIS IS HOW YOU ADVERTISE HOLY SHIT

aonomiki:

Your friends are allowed to have friends who are not you. They are even allowed to be better friends with them than they are you.

Your friends are not your possessions, you don’t get to dictate who they can and can’t talk to.

If you think you can, you might just be a problem.

fightblr:

building-an-unstoppable-fist:

secretworld-observer:

kellyfromthecity:

The next person who makes a joke about my pole dancing and calls me a stripper, I’m going to show them this photo and say, “You may or may not take me seriously, but just know that I can probably crush your tiny little skull with my thigh muscles.”

There’s nothing I don’t love about this.

bruh

HOLY SHIT!!!

fightblr:

building-an-unstoppable-fist:

secretworld-observer:

kellyfromthecity:

The next person who makes a joke about my pole dancing and calls me a stripper, I’m going to show them this photo and say, “You may or may not take me seriously, but just know that I can probably crush your tiny little skull with my thigh muscles.”

There’s nothing I don’t love about this.

bruh

HOLY SHIT!!!

runs-on-reindeer:

When my sister was in the Marines some little shit told her to make him a sandwich so she went to his boss and they used money from the asshole’s next paycheck to order subs for the entire squadron

(Source: runs-on-ramen)

fukkkres:

when ur eating dinner at your friends house

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and their parents start arguing

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and you want to ask for the salt

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but the salt is right in between their upcoming divorce

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thisurltotallysucks:

dion-thesocialist:

It’s hilarious that we live in a society that will shame you for how much sex you have and for the junk food you eat. Like, wow, how dare you eat delicious foods and have orgasms, you’re a monster. Enjoy your miserable life filled with pleasures.

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